My Heart

I thought I'd take a quick break from posting all my 365s this morning to collect my thoughts... It's a bit of a read, but something I'm going to do anyway. So there.

It kills me that I wasted so many opportunities when I was younger and put uni on the back-burner. I don't even slightly regret getting married young or tying myself down with a mortgage, I just wish I had prepared for these years better by focusing on getting a degree when it was easier, and I was living at home with my parents. I went to a damn good school, and graduated with the marks to take on virtually any degree that I wanted to. Instead I got comfortable with the simplicity of working a 9-5, getting paid leave, and never having to stress about exams or assignments. Silly me.

Having said that, I'm happy. Yes, I have regrets and I wish I'd made some different choices, but I'm pretty sure everyone's in the same boat. I have an amazing husband. I have a comfortable house. I have 2 dogs that are crazy about me. I have the best family a girl could ask for. I have friendships that some girls only ever dream about having. I have hobbies and dreams, and I find excitement in the silliest little things sometimes. Here are some examples of unexpected things that make my heart feel like it's flying:

- Doing a full grocery shop, and having a fully-stocked pantry and fridge once again
- My dogs finding me sitting on the couch, and flopping down on top of me in a completely casual, comfortable way
- Watching butterflies fluttering around my slowly-developing garden
- Before-work phone calls with my Mum
- Prepping dinner in the morning so that it's quick and easy to cook that night
- Extended trade for grocery stores, and the knowledge that if at 7pm on any weeknight I realise that our cheese is mouldy, I can duck out to Woolworths
- Growing plants from seed
- Making list after list of small goals for my day/week/month/season
- Finding new recipes
- Nights at home - with Chris, or alone

Chris and I have been discussing lately the fact that so many people we know, particularly from high school days, seem to have so much - the high-paying job, the travel, the things that we, as humans, naturally want for ourselves. But at the same time, we have known for a while that we're completely happy, completely blessed, with our life together. Our cups are full. I think to a lot of people looking in from the outside, we're just another pair of un-qualified, overweight people working low-level jobs, who live in an ex-rental in an 'undesirable' suburb and wear cheap, crappy clothes. But from where we're standing, life's so much sweeter. Perspective is interesting I guess, and learning to be happy with what you've got is the most important lesson in life. It's the biggest cliche in the world, but it's true.